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Trying to Breathe

Someone tell me this is normal.

We are days away from closing escrow on a home that may be, to me, one of the most charming homes imaginable. At the same time, I am days away from everyone I know having the opportunity of reading my book and deciding for themselves if I can or cannot actually write. I am hours away from my first real day as a Barista in a coffeehouse. A job I used to pine for, years ago before my world went haywire.

These are all good things, and yet, I feel like I cannot breathe. My hands are shaking and I am filled with anxiety.

But I know this is not who I am. God called me to this day, for these things. He created me and has given me all I need to make it through today. He did not line these things up in October for the events to overpower me, and my fears will not push me to the place of behaving badly.

God cannot breathe for me, but He breathes through me, and I am strong enough and brave enough in Him.

Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning. Lamentations 3:23

 

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13 thoughts on “Trying to Breathe

  1. โค๏ธ your honest, open heart! ๐Ÿ™ for these steps God is directing your life and to calm your heart! โค๏ธ

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  2. “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”
    PSA 73:26 ESV

    God bless you Jackie.

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  3. I’ve been there… not exactly, but close… the anxiety, the new beginnings … focus on taking deep breaths and know that God is right there with you. Praying all goes well for you, my friend โค

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  4. You ARE normal, Jackie!! What’s NOT normal is to acknowledge God and lean on Him … unless you love Him and follow Him, which you do! (And very beautifully, I might add!) I pray that He will calm your heart and fill you with confidence. I can’t wait to read your book!!!

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  5. Love you. Continue to breathe. The Lord has wired and designed you to be used by him. New location. New house. New adventures. New ways to be used by Him in our weakness.

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  6. Fear has no authority over us, unless we give it. Speak to the fear in the name of Jesus and demand that it leave. Love your heart and your openness.

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